Just Give Me a Reason

With the crown of Scotland almost in our power at this stage, we just need one last reason to go to war against the Scottish king to usurp his last bit of power. In all fairness though, I am unifying the Celtic peoples to go beat up on the English, so in that sense this game is historically accurate, right?

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God Save the Queen
- Carvan

It's Only a Revolution if You Win

With many of the English nobility seemingly constantly in a state of revolt, we find ourselves surrounded by opportunities for more land grabs. On the flip side however, our growing realm and desmense prove fertile ground for continued revolts against our own power. Can't we all just get along...?

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God Save the Queen
- Carvan

The Most Useless Office Ever Devised by the Mind of Man

Spoiler Alert. We pick up the title of King of Ireland in this part, but the King of England becomes emperor of Britannia. Furthermore it seems that all of our luck with securing more claims has wholly dried up. Just when we grab at some real power, everything slows down. This must be what being the vice president is like.

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

Burning the Candle at Both Ends

Growing our power, we take advantage of fights and revolts both to the north of us in the Scottish lands and to the south of us in Lancaster. Truly an English way to wage a war I think. Let people fight amongst themselves and then come in and take everything while they're looking the wrong way.

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

Filling the Cumberland Gap

Greetings and salutations! We return back to the Crusader Kings LP with Ireland firmly under our thumb we change our focus back to mainland Britain and also the Isle of Man for some more land grabbing, and also find ourselves up against our first (surely of many) rebellions within the realm.

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

I Am Fairly Out, And You Are Fairly In

Greetings. I hope you are all well stuffed on leftovers still and perhaps got some lovely shopping deals as well. You know where the pilgrims came from right? England. You know who loves England? Carvan? Do you know who can't think of a better transition to open up this next segment of the Let's Play? Forget it. Don't answer. Just watch these videos and eat more food.

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God Save the Queen
- Carvan

Erin Go Take Over Ireland

Hello friends! Our conquest of the British Isles continues as we pick on Ireland, and in our spare time we take part in a Danish succession crisis. We fabricate some claims, have some wars, and just generally serve to be a complete menace, all the while increasing our power. Sound like fun? Of course it is, because dear readers, history is fun!

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

It's the Counties that Count

Greetings friends.

Rest assured that I am preparing my rebuttal for tomorrow based on Kalpar's scathing review of V for Vendetta. However, in the meantime, I do have some Let's Plays for you. We look to expand our territories by moving into more or less neutral territories in Wales and Ireland. They're not neutral in the sense that they are unowned, but they are simply owned by people who are not powerful enough to stop us, therefore they belong to us. See? Aren't I a good Englishman?

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

The Doomsday Book

Welcome to the first installment of my next LP adventure, this time into Crusader Kings II. If you have not yet read the review/summary I had previously posted, I would suggest that now. Go on. I'll wait.

Right, caught up? In this section we go over some of the rules and basic strategy of how the game works, and step our character and our territories up, before dealing with the double invasion of the Norwegian king Harald Hardrade and the Norman claimant, William (the Conqueror), for the throne of England. Enjoy!

Part 1: (Largely a tutorial video for gameplay mechanics)

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

'Til we Have Built Jerusalem in England's Green and Pleasant Land!

Welp kiddos, here it is. The final installment of my Medieval II Let's Play. I hope it's been fun viewing for you as much as it has been fun playing for me. In this bit we smack the Polish around a bit for their insolence and try to make up for a blunder at Cordoba, all the while sailing for Jerusalem for a... less than climactic battle... Oh well.

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God Save the Queen
- Carvan

This is the Penultimate Supper!

At the start of this LP, I incorrectly predict that this will be the last session. Oh well. The English force of arms carries on with a battle here and there as our preparations for the final assault on Jerusalem come to a head. Anchors away as we sail across the Mediterranean!

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God Save the Queen
- Carvan

Deus Vult!

Welp, here I am with yet another LP update for you. Slightly less exciting and battle heavy than usual, but then again, we are steadily running out of people to kill... Oh well. At least there is a Crusade to keep things interesting!

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

De Bello Hispaniensi e Germanicum

Some pitched battles against the Danes and an assault on the fortresses in Iberia form the crux of this update.  We also work on buying our way back into the Pope's good graces, because medieval popes are corrupt like that. Enjoy!

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

The Prodigal Son Returns

Good news everyone! Carvan has another Let's Play after a bit of a hiatus. Sorry about that. Got involved in the Steam sale at the end of July and Crusader Kings and Civilization V ate up ages of my time. Not to mention the fact that the school year crept up on me like a ninja or something. Seriously.

Anyway enough of my blathering via text, listen to me blather in these lovely Let's Play vids! Enjoy!

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

A Horse, A Horse, My Kingdom For a Horse!

We are burning both ends of the candle as we press against the Danes on one side and the Spanish on the other. Now if only there was another faction we could set ourselves up against...

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

Over the Hills and O'er the Main

Over the hills, and o'er the main
To Flanders, Portugal and Spain
The king commands and we'll obey
And go over the hills and far away.

While we have not yet reached Portugal, this 17th century English folk tune, with seemingly innumerable versions of lyrics is a pretty good description of what we are working towards accomplishing at this part. Also it's been stuck in Kalpar's head lately, so I figured I'd do what I could to help him out in that department.

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

On Desperate Ground, Fight

Finding ourselves with enemies on all sides (granted some of them self-made) and an enemy in St. Peter's chair (okay, that one was very much self-made) we stand on desperate ground and therefore, as Sun Tzu said, we must fight.

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God Save the Queen

 - Carvan

There is a Tide in the Affairs of Men

There is a tide in the affairs of men,
Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune,
Omitted, and the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
On such a full sea are we now afloat,
And we must take the current when it serves,
Or lose our ventures.

  -   Brutus from Julius Caesar Act IV, scene iii, 218-224

England has certainly been riding the high tides to glory of late, but how long will those tides favour us? Stay tuned to find out!

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

Godzilla in a Neck Tie

As John Oliver said, "People yearn for the days of the British Empire; longing to be treated that badly that politely." Therefore we have endeavored with all our strength to (p)re-establish that. We seek to unify modern day Italy and France under English rule, and seek a religious conversion through waves of priests and bishops. Truly we are the great liberators of the Medieval era, bringing culture and sophistication to the barbarians in southern Europe!

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan

I Thought Italians Just Hung Out and Drove Around on Scooters Saying "Ciao!"

Our foray into the Italian peninsula resumes as we have to contend with the Venetians and the Papacy in pretty much equal measure. I largely came off this Let's Play session feeling like this about Italy. Hope it's some fun viewing!

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God Save the Queen

- Carvan